vegas, baby

posted on: Wednesday, August 1, 2012

me and the bachelorette. twins.

bathroom mirror self portrait. standard.

it just wouldn't have been complete without Elvis.

three pharmacists, a teacher, a high-risk-OB ultrasound technician...
and an ER doctor

annnnd a flower replica of a Monet. thanks Bellagio.

there you have it.
Vegas via my iPhone. 
most of these are pictures i sent to my huz.
i spared you all a few of the rougher ones.
you're welcome.

before our respective bachelor and bachelorette parties,
Nick and I talked a lot about trust and fidelity. 
he brought it up mostly. he was nervous about me going to Vegas.
(this begs the question, what did HE do when he went to Vegas?? hmmm...)
we watch movies on a pretty regular basis,
and last week's pick was "The Last Kiss"
if you haven't seen it--spoiler alert--Zach Braff cheats on his pregnant girlfriend (Jacinda Barrett) with a very scandalous Rachel Bilson.
very apropos.

we've talked a lot about cheating in our five years (!) together.
which may seem odd to you
it seemed odd to me as it was happening. almost like...don't jinx it! we've got a good thing here! quit it with all your cheating talk!
but Nick has always been one to take the difficult topics by the horns.
best to have everything out in the open.
so we talked about it.
and how precious the trust we shared between us is, and just how catastrophic it would be to destroy that trust with a lie, or with infidelity. 
and how long and hard we'd have to work to build it back.
over the years we've talked about how the recipe for disaster is always some underlying discontent, coupled with an opportunity presenting itself...and alcohol.

well, enter Vegas. 
you most certainly have opportunities...and alcohol.
so Nick and i made sure to leave things on a good note.
no stirrings of discontent or unresolved conflicts before we left each other.
but still, when he kissed me goodbye at the airport,
he said "don't get drunk and have sex with a stranger!"

and i didn't.
not even close.
didn't even think about it.
to me, this seems a little obvious.
i would never cheat on my husband! 
i just wouldn't!
or would i?
i'm not infallible. 

i love my husband with a love so deep that it aches sometimes.
i treasure the trust we share
and i feel so safe with him. both physically and emotionally.
i would never choose to do anything that would take away from the us that is.
but things happen. lots of little things, at first.
and they chip away at what you've got
devaluing it and making it easier to throw it away
nobody thinks "i'm going to cheat on my husband someday" on their wedding day
but life happens
things change. and it's your job to make sure that they're changing in ways that strengthen you.

so all this to say
it's good to talk about it.
just so you remember who you are and where you stand.
especially before you go to Vegas.


  1. you rock! As you say sometimes you have to take the topic by the horns and deal with it. Not that it is a problem or will be a problem but you've laid the foundation to make it strong.

    Like a house - you don't build it on the sand you build it on the rock. You build it with firm and strong foundations then (if and) when a storm does come it withstands it - you batten down the hatches and you deal with it :)

    Rock on lady!!!

  2. Love your pictures! And I'm going to Vegas next week, we've definitely talked about this. He's not worried about it though. However, he does think I will get kidnapped...

  3. We're big on trust in our relationship. BIG. I'm sure you can guess part of why... since situations that require blind-trust aren't uncommon. We've often gotten comments from friends who find it weird that I'll tell Paul if there's a nice piece of eye candy at work, or the fact that he told me about going to a strip club in Canada on a work trip once- we're open with this info because we've got trust- and both know the situations don't cross the line of inappropriate. I think it's the best kind of relationship.

    1. Oh, and HOLY SHIT, girl. Nice Herve Leger.

  4. I. Completely. Agree.
    My husband and I talk about this sort of thing all the time. Just as you said, no one plans on cheating, and it's unlikely to happen if things are fantastic at home. But it's never an impossibility, and you never know what the future holds. One day (God forbid), I may be a fat, tired, overworked mama, or he'll be a bald, stressed out, couch potato, and if we don't have a good thing going between us, it's a recipe for disaster.

  5. yes! so true. trust and fidelity are the backbones of a marriage, and therefore super important to talk about! you look totally hot, btw! i love vegas!

  6. I agree with you...talking about it is important! I also agree that if a person cheats or thinks about it..underlying discontent..for sure! BTW..that blue looks great on your girls...both times I have been to vegas I have gone with the Mr. hahaha

  7. Great dress, great shoes and great post. It's great that you can talk about big issues like that with each other. So true that nobody ever expects to cheat when they get married so it's important to keep strengthening your relationship to make sure it never happens.

  8. i think that it's so important to have this talk. the boyf and i are super long distance [california + germany] and have lots of trust because, well...we only see each other 6 weeks out of the year. we aren't married, but i feel the same way as you do: i would never cheat on him, i wouldn't even think about it. the distance won't be for too much longer and he will be my husband someday. that doesn't mean that i don;t love some good eye candy with a side of booze ;)

  9. hot damn girl you look amazing! of course nick would say dont have sex with a stranger. lol

    But seriously..great talk..great post..agree with it all..i wont delve deep because there are some residual wounds from my past marriage. we will just leave it at that.


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