this is a blog about me, Emily. a freshly married ER doctor in the Air Force who likes to eat and shop and do many other also seemingly dichotomous things which are chronicled herein.
welp.
i'm not in the mood to discuss hopes and dreams at the moment.
i'm pretty cranky. for many reasons.
so i'm using my liberties as dictator of this blog and making a slight edit.
#9 is no longer how you hope your future will be like.
#9 is now #12. Bullet your whole day.
and #12 is #9.
this is both because on day #12 i will be driving. and bulleting a day of driving is boring.
and also because i'm cranky. fighting with the hubs. cold. sore. hungry. and just generally a big ray of sunshine at the moment.
so here we go.
wake up at 6:45
kiss the husband
pee. wash face. brush teeth.
attempt to get dressed [note the lack of shower. fear not. it happened last night. the hair, however, was not washed. hence the bad hair day.]
note that laundry still was not done, so therefore you are out of clean scrubs. [fail]
put on "professional" attire.
fix lunch. and coffee. to go.
feed the cat.
walk 2 blocks to where your car is parked (thanks, Lincoln Park) and drive to work.
rediscover one's love for John Mayer on the way to work.
at the hospital, look up overnight info and lab results on your patients in the Critical Cardiology unit.
see, examine, and talk to patients (those that do not exclusively speak Romanian)
make suggestions to the residents about what the patients need (Echo's, sleep studies, Heparin anti-Xa levels, etc.)
go to lecture (at this point, it is 10am)
go to lunch lecture
skip out on lunch lecture after 15 minutes
realize you are bored. play Words with Friends.
round with the Attending Physician whose mission in life is to purposely ask you questions that you don't know the answer to.
see, examine, talk to new patients
leave the hospital
decide whether to go to the gym
see a good parking spot in your neighborhood and decide to DEFINITELY not go to the gym
randomly conduct a major purge of one's closet
start laundry
eat dinner
shower
rinse, and repeat.
well there ya go. not leaps and bounds more interesting than describing a long drive by oneself, but hey...it's my life. welcome to it.
now do you see why i blog? you people are infinitely more interesting than me.
7. your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality
well, friends. i am a capricorn.
and that is the full extent of my knowledge of astrology.
that, and occasionally reading my horoscope just to see how bogus it is.
i'm going to skip this one if it's okay with you.
because a) i just don't give two hoots about astrology and b) i took a second to look up what a capricorn is SUPPOSED to be like and i didn't like it. capricorns sound kind of like uber-structured, hoity-toity know-it-all bitches.
which is not me.
i hope.
please have the courage to break it to me if you think i am wrong.
dammit.
okay maybe it is me. a little.
but Nick is also a capricorn, and HE isn't like that at all.
take that, astrologers.
moving on.
8. a moment you felt most satisfied with your life
how bout a few?
impromptu. on a hike. along the Deschutes. circa 2008.
same summer. Eureka, MT. Glen Lake in the background. looove those jeans. a lil too much.
05.28.10
and this one. as in, right now.
i'd say i'm pretty satisfied with life at the moment.
with the exception of being STARVING.
but no worries
it's Restaurant Week here in chicago.
and we are going to Epic
thank. God. it's something light and fluffy.
after yesterday's heaviness, we need a little fluffiness up in this blog.
i'll try to think of new things that i haven't already blogged about.
surely i am interesting enough to think up 30 totally NEW things.
we'll see...
1. i tend to O.D. on fruit. i ate so many bananas in the first 5 years of my life, that i couldn't stand bananas until about 6 months ago. now i like 'em again. i also used to have a big thing for granny smith apples. now me and granny smith are on the outs.
2. i dye my own hair. but i don't use a box. my bff Johanna is a master colorist (that may or may not be her actual title. but it's what i choose to call her.) and she showed me how to put together my colors and my developer to get what i want. this doesn't stop my hair stylist here in Chicago from openly judging me for dyeing it myself. it's ok. i still love him.
3. i have saved every card or note i have received since high school. the ones from Nick are in a special place.
4. i was cross-eyed as a baby. Nick thinks this is hilarious.
5. my favorite book is called "The River Why". it's about fly fishing. and philosophy. two things i know relatively little about. yet i love it. it resonates with me.
6. i am awesome at making playlists.
exhibit A: a little conglomeration i made for my guests at my wedding reception in Cali. it's songs about Cali, mixed with some of my and Nick's faves.
enjoy.
7. i don't think i have ever broken a bone. i hit my toe pretty hard once, and now it's sort of crooked. so i might've broken that. but still. no radiographical evidence.
8. when i was 9, my brother "accidentally" hit me in the middle of my forehead with a hatchet. the blunt end. thank.god. now i have a scar in the shape of the state of Florida in the middle of my forehead.
see?
it's the teensy crease. by my vividly painted nail.
9. speaking of scars, i also bit off my tongue when i was 13 months old. this was in Brazil. there's a horrifying story that my mom tells really well about how there was no emergency room...the doctor took a long time to show up...no time for anesthesia...me screaming so she could hear me as she was walking around a city block in downtown Rio de Janeiro...me with a large purple head (after all the screaming). i'll spare you the photos. but they thought i would never talk again.
maybe i can't talk.
none of you would know.
just kidding. i can talk.
a lot.
10. peonies are my favorite flower.
at a streetside flower stand in Lucca, Italy
waiting to be plucked up for my wedding bouquet
me and Meg, perusing the merchandise
plastic buckets of beauty
that's how i roll
11. gin and tonics are my go-to cocktail. Beefeater is my favorite. mostly because i like walking up to bars and saying "beefeater and tonic, please". try it. it's fun. (i also like champagne cocktails. of any kind.)
12. if i am totally honest with myself, i really DO want to have a baby. like, now. what's holding me back is the whole parenting thing. having a baby is way different than becoming a parent. totally not ready for that yet. the biological clock vs. the rationale. the debate continues.
13. i like to wake up slow in the morning. i don't require a snooze. but i do slowly transition from the bed...to the couch...to the kitchen (to make the coffee of course)...to the bathroom (to pee. and brush my teeth.). nick likes to wake up fast. like a shotgun going off. most days, i am indifferent to this. other days, it really annoys me. don't worry. he knows.
14. as if i haven't gone to school for long enough, i have always dreamed of going back to school later...like, after i retire. i want to study philosophy. it fascinates me.
15. my biggest regret in life is not studying abroad in London my junior year of college. at Cambridge. most of my friends went then...it would've been the most amazing experience. probably would've changed my life. i didn't go because of money. since then, i've tried never to let a little money keep me from experiencing amazing things.
16. the best massage i've ever gotten was at Bliss Chicago. they live up to the name. however, Nick does give me massages--shoulders, hands, feet, etc--on a pretty regular basis. and his are a clooooose second.
17. my cat's full name is Bartonella henselae. i named her after the bacteria that causes Cat Scratch Fever. i still think this is hilarious.
18. i don't really like cake.
19. i haven't had a period since May.2010. birth control is a beautiful and amazing thing. ask me how.
20. i am a total clean freak. my house is immaculate 95% of the time. i blame the type A personality. feel free to begin loathing me at any time. my husband feels your pain.
21. i have a pair of Frye Harness boots that i got for free in a trade. they're old and beat-up, and possibly men's boots. but they're my favorite. they look kinda like this.
23. i am in a music club with my besties from college. we started it in July, at my wedding reception. every month, one of us is charged with the task of sending each of the others a cd of new music. could be a mix, could be a full album. doesn't matter. just has to be new. AND you have to give reasons for your picks. it has been the best idea we've ever had. keeps us in touch. and since we are located in LA, Chicago, Durham NC, and Baton Rouge...we get a pretty good mix of music that's emerging all over the country. seriously. best.idea.ever.
sisterhood of the traveling....music
24. if i could pick an actress to play me in a movie, i'd have to go with Lauren Graham.
25. my first date was freshman year of college. (see? shelt.ered.) i really liked him. the date went great. then he didn't speak to me again till sophomore year. i found out senior year that he was scared of me. awesome.
26. the body part that i am most comfortable with is definitely my legs. love affairs with the other parts come and go. but i can always count on my legs to make me feel like i look good.
27. i am a long.hair.girl. when it's super long, sometimes i get the short-hair-itch and chop it off. and inevitably, i am loooonging for the long hair again within a matter of weeks. i'm currently in a grow-it-back-out stage and find myself swearing that i will never chop it off again. talk to me again in 3-4 years. we'll see if my resolve stands.
28. i still have not managed to find my signature scent. any suggestions?
29. one of my absolute favorite things to do is get home from work...put on a little Stan Getz and Joao Gilberto...open a bottle of red...and starting cooking. drinking wine+cooking+listening to music=heaven.
30. i am generally pretty lucky. for example: yesterday i decided (after the 3rd wear. ever.) that the Jimmy Choo's i splurged on for my wedding were just too small. (maybe my feet grew in the past year? weird.) so today i decided to go to Nordstrom's and try my luck with the ol' exchange. the peeps at the shoe counter were prettty skeptical, and didn't think they had any left. and they were definitely sporting 'tudes about me trying to return shoes i had worn. almost a year later. (my bad.)
but then. miracle of miracles. there was one pair left.
in my size.
on sale.
so i got a brand new pair of Jimmy Choo's that fit even better than my old ones, AND 250 bucks back.
lil' back story: i come from a pretttty religious family.
i'm the granddaughter of two preachers (both sides).
i was born in Brazil...because my parents were missionaries there when i was born.
i can't remember a time when i didn't go to church.
i was more familiar with Bible stories than Disney movies as a kid.
we went to a Church of Christ for a long time, and then started going to non-denominational churches. youth group was as much of a given in my life as eating and breathing. i went to a Christian college. and it wasn't just about church, Christianity was what formed my worldview. my faith was very important to me. i was pretty sheltered, too. even though i went to a more "liberal" Christian college, it was still suuuper conservative. tons of rules and regulations, curfews, etc. i was surrounded by people who all thought and believed the same way (for the most part). and i was pretty judgmental about anyone and everyone who saw things differently than i did. not too proud about that part. but i am thankful for the foundation that faith and church-going laid in my life.
bottom line:
religion and faith (and yes, i believe these are two very different things) have been a big part of my life.
religion, and Christianity in particular, has a tendency to be pretty black and white. as the years have passed, and as i've come into contact with more and more people who believed differently than i did--and came to love and respect these people--i find it harder and harder to believe that God is so exclusive. and in my experience with churches, i've found that all too often, they seem to find it more important that everyone have the same theology than to be representatives of God's love.
i'm not going to get into a theological debate about on the finer points of the Westminster Catechism. and i'm not here to discuss creation vs evolution, the means to salvation, original sin, the infallibility of scripture, or any of that. (though if you want to, email away...i just fear the blog might not be the proper avenue.) i just have a hard time with the "i am the way, the truth, and the life. no one comes to the Father but through me". like i said, it just seems to portray a more exclusive God than the one i know.
as a result, over the past 4-5 years, i've strayed a bit (okay, a lot) from religion. now, i recognize that i have a lot of religious baggage...and because of that, i have a really hard time walking into a church without waves of bitterness overcoming me. to the point where any attempt to worship is futile. so i'm taking a little break from religion for a while.
but my faith is still here.
admittedly, my faith is a bit fuzzy these days...lacking in definition at times. i apologize for that. but it's there.
so here's what i DO believe: i believe that God exists. always has...outside of time. i believe he created everything that we are and experience as humans on this earth. i believe he is all-loving and all-powerful (though i, too, am confused about when he chooses to play which card). i believe in Jesus, and that he is the Son of God. and i believe my job is to try to be as accurate a representation of God's love to everyone around me as i possibly can.
that's about all i got...in a nutshell. i just try to keep my eyes and my heart open as i journey through life. and above all, i keep asking big questions. maybe i'll never get any concrete answers, but at the very least i'll be fixated on worthwhile pursuits.
still with me?
good. here's a couple sunny pics of me in tanner and slightly skinnier days to break up the heaviness.
i'll be back there in seven days...
get warm for me, sweet Atlantic.
the fruits of my labor.
before i ate him.
5. A time you thought about ending your own life.
well, isn't this just a sun-shiney post?
i can say, with thankfulness, that though i've gotten pretty low at some points, i have never contemplated suicide.
even in my darkest days, circa 2006, when my first attempt at getting into med school failed miserably, i still managed to cry it out, and wake up the next day with a very Pollyanna-ish sense of "tomorrow is a new day, without any mistakes in it yet".
so i'll leave it at that.
i hope nobody hates me after this post. and i really hope i'm not offending anybody either. if you feel the need to set me straight, or berate me in any way, i hope you'll do it "in person". ya know, over email. emkreidel@gmail.com
in brief: i'm cool with alcohol, but drugs are not cool.
and yes, i am aware that the above statement is childishly worded.
let me explain.
(even though i'm pretty much going to come to the same conclusions)
i enjoy a glass of wine after work, or a nice little happy hour cocktail.
and i have been known to take an Irish car bomb with the best of 'em.
and i should probably stop there, at the risk of incriminating myself.
professionalism is key, after all. (:
from a health perspective, i think alcohol...like most other things...is fine, even healthy, in moderation.
(though admittedly, i have recently found a cardiologist who would argue otherwise.)
(i have employed selective listening when he speaks.)
drugs, however, have never been cool with me.
they're very addictive, for one.
i have seen first hand how they can destroy people's lives.
and the health benefits are pretty scarce
the medical marijuana advocates might argue against me...and if any of you are counted among them, i'm not trying to offend any of you.
and hey, to be honest, if you have cancer and chronic pain and you wanna toke up, be my guest dude.
cancer's a bitch, and if a little high takes the edge off for ya, smoke it if you got it.
**note: i have never been high. i just happen to listen to bob marley and sublime on occasion. i've got the lingo down.
plus, like most type-A control freaks, the whole loss-of-control thing associated with drugs just makes me uneasy. one could argue that alcohol also induces a similar sensation, but that feeling is one i've managed to tolerate a little better.
so there you have it.
that's where i stand, pretty much.
any questions?
changing gears, ever so slightly...
the hubs is out of town.
[sad face]
he left today to go snowboarding in Aspen with his besties.
just because he's gone doesn't mean i have to eat ramen noodles.
so here's what i had for dinner:
i had a lil beef with it too. (:
leftover from V-day dinner. marinated tri-tip. yum-town.
and a glass of cabernet.
my fave.
(the hubs prefers pinot noir--cabs are too "big" for him, delicate palate, you know--so i have to indulge when he's gone)
i couldn't let you all believe that i had gone vegan. that would be a poor representation of my person.
honesty first.
the town has a logo.
at the very least, their skateboards do
the plan is, as it stands currently, that Nick follows me around to wherever the Air Force deems fit--both for the next 3 years for residency, and for the 4 years of Active Duty Service Commitment that i owe them after that--and then we go where he wants: Santa Cruz.
SC is Nick's hometown. why he moved away to Chicago for med school, i'll never know.
but i'm sure glad he did. (:
and i'm sure glad he wants to go back there. this "deal" we have going isn't going to be super hard to keep up on my end.
also, some other details:
i think in 10 years, it might be time for some bambinos to have come along.
maybe we'll finally be homeowners?
i'd really love it if we had a boat too.
i'll be practicing emergency medicine somewhere...loving every second of my job...
and loving coming home and leaving it all behind...and being fully present at home with my family
and please God, if i could still be a size 2, that'd be great.
well, i am currently married.
have been so for, ohhhhh, 8.7 months now.
(totally an estimate)
and i hope to be so for the rest of my life
(i take offense to those chicks who go into marriage with the outlook that their current fiance makes a good "first husband")
i'm optimistic. thus far.
but then again, i'm optimistic about most things in life.
i'm a sunny-side up, Pollyanna kinda girl.
but i digress.
my relationship:
nick is not the guy i thought i would end up with. or at least, so i thought when we first met...during orientation week of med school. (circa fall 2007)
**note: this isn't a "love story" post. i'll save that for another time and post.
but it wasn't long after we first started dating, that i knew.
ya know, that he was the "One".
first of all, one of the big hangups i had with marriage, and men in general, was my fear that I would be more committed to the marriage than my man was. i'm a pretty stick-to-it kinda girl. case in point: i started this med school dream/process 12 years ago. and i'm still chugging. and about to actually do it. i don't quit. i was afraid to get married, not because i was afraid it would be hard--i knew it would be--i was afraid that "he" (whoever he was) would quit. and then i'd be stuck there. alone. against my will.
two weeks after nick and i started dating, we had a fateful conversation about arranged marriage. i know. weird, right? what was weirder, is that we both concluded that it wasn't THAT strange or antiquated of an idea. i mean, you get married, and you stick to it. the love grows, and deepens, and you make it work.
this is one of the things i love about nick. he's committed. this is huge for me. i know he's not all talk and flowers and fairytales. there's substance to the man.
he took the time to dig deep and discover the softie that lies beneath my crass and sarcastic exterior. and he loves me. all of me.
he encourages me to be the best "me" i can be...to develop as many skills and different aspects of my personality as i want to.
he is so diverse, too. we can engage about medicine--even though our interests in medicine are VERY different...i like emergency medicine (the faster the pace, the more blood, the better), he likes rehab medicine, especially spinal cord and traumatic brain injuries (a good day for him is when his paraplegic patient can suddenly wiggle his left big toe). but we can also talk about religion, politics, philosophy...BOOKS we like to read (even though he reads more books than i do. i have too many blogs to read. hee hee).
and if i didn't love him so much, i'd hate that he is so freaking athletic. he's literally good at every sport: snowboarding, wakeboarding, basketball, soccer, softball, golf, underwater basket weaving. and i, my friends, missed out on the athleticism gene. i look like a doofus when i try to play sports. hand-eye coordination is something i only possess when i'm suturing. i'm the twenty-something chick careening down the bunny hills out of control on a snowboard at breakneck speeds trying not to decapitate the five-year-olds.
so there's our relationship. sort of. hope that gives you some idea...
we're pretty happy.
not all day, every day.
but every day.
(thanks Charlotte York Goldenblatt. name that movie?)
and if you're still reading, here's some lil' snapshots from our weekend at the Drake Hotel...
as a reward.
for reading so much.
fluffy pillows + king-sized bed = heaven
my handsome hubby
sign of good times to come...
(he's reading a book about the Drake)
we ate there. (the cape cod room) and so did marilyn monroe.
our view. helloooo lake michigan. and lakeshore drive, good to see you sans snowdrifts.
had a lil' fun with our chandelier-y thingy
when it's overexposed it looks like a sun!
silly kids. upside down.
a deliiiiish swan creme puff.
snow queen centerpiece
fishies. jess cornett, they're not whales, but they still make me think of you.
afternoon tea at the Palm Court.
as you can see, we ate it all. almost.
sommmmebody had a leetle fun with the camera.
so i decided to, too.
the French room. it's blue.
hubs thinks he's quite the sharp shooter these days. post photog class.
i woke up feeling an absolute NEED to paint my nails
so i did.
before work.
and i was slightly late for work as a result.
totally worth it.
now they're red.
then i went to work, as usual.
and came home unusually early
which was good
because i--not unlike a little elf--was very busy
i made a few decorations so our little shoebox would look particularly lovey
i made shortbread and sliced strawberries
for strawberry shortcake
i made meat and potatoes
(because this is the way to a man's heart)
(also, conveniently, the way to my own heart)
(two-for-one. super)
i lit candles.
opened wine.
wore a festive apron.
and i don't have pictures of any of it.
...
i do, however, have pictures from this weekend
where the hubs and i spent a delightful couple of days luxurizing at the Drake Hotel
but i will not be sharing them tonight
more on this later
i will, however, be doing this
i don't know if you've been following this blog for very long
but if you have, you probably are thinking:
"great. another countdown-type thingy.
she's never gonna get through this."
and i would have to agree with you.
but in 31 days, we find out if my hubs will be spending the next four years
in san antonio with me? (yes plz)
or in california (good? no. i'm stuck in san antonio. check out a map. this is bad.)
or in houston (might as well be california.)
and it will be st. patty's day.
(side note: right at this moment, facebook, via my iPhone alerted me to the fact that one of my friends "checked in" at taco bell. color me disgusted. plus i just watched "the social network" and now thoroughly feel as though facebook has rapidly infiltrated and taken over my life.)
(that's all)
i can't decide which thing is better to countdown to.
a little photo of one of our most famous landmarks, courtesy of the AP.
tuesday night, the storm was ridiculous.
it literally thundersnowed.
until yesterday, i had no idea what that meant, but basically it's just like it sounds:
a thunderstorm, with snow.
there was lightning, and thunder, and that eerie light that the sky gets during weird storms.
cool, and crazy, all at once.
there was a brief lull in the storm in the morning yesterday, so nick and i decided it would be a good idea to do some trekking. at then end of this lil string of photos, you'll see evidence that perhaps it was not.
here's some of my shots:
our front door. not sure why it's so blurry. maybe my hands were frostbitten.
our street.
cleveland ave. right across the street from us.
fullerton pkwy, at 9am on a tuesday.
nick. on fullerton pkwy. at 9am on a tuesday.
pooooooor animals.
[chicago]
lake.shore.drive (why is that car facing backwards?)
that, my friends, is lake michigan.
it is hard to keep one's eyes open when icy winds are blowing into them. {hat: j.crew; jacket: juicy couture} i try to stay fashionable, even when i'm freezing.
standing riiiight in the middle of lakeshore drive
poor stranded cars.
looks like somebody made good use of their stranded ordeal (:
more of the same.
looking so steely he is. with the snow in his eyes.
my exit!
on the way back home, it started blizzarding again.
we trekked back with the snow in our faces.
here is the end result.
warning:
it ain't pretty, friends.
note the snow in the beard.
note to self: mascara + blizzards=bad combo.
so there you have it.
we survived our first blizzard.
not just survived.
we THRIVED.
we watched The Pianist
(which was wayyy more depressing than i remembered)
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